the cotton ball...

last night i opened up a new bottle of ibuprofen...as is usually the case, before i could get to the miracle cure for my near-exploding head, i had to punch through the foil cover on the bottle...to my frustration, though, that was not the end of the process to attaining the wonder-drug...next i was faced with having to remove a cotton ball from the bottle...a cotton ball...now let me say...the foil i understand...i can even go so far as to say i appreciate the foil...it gives me peace of mind that my bottle of goodness hasnt been tampered with...i see its purpose...the cotton ball, however...thats a different story...really...what's the reason?...i pondered this for awhile and i never came to a conclusion...i considered that maybe the cotton ball was in there to soak up any moisture (gross word) that might somehow get into the bottle...but then i decided that with the foil cover there was no way that the moisture (almost throwing up now) could get in there...so then i entertained another idea...what if the cotton ball was in the bottle to provide security to the goodness that is inside...you know...that way the drugs inside wouldnt get all banged up and break into pieces...is that the reason?...i dont know...

now i considered taking this line of thinking to a whole new level...thanks to my buddy josh g...i mean, one could ask the question...is this what jesus is like in your life? is jesus your spiritual cotton ball? he serves a purpose...an important one...he protects and gives security...but in reality you're just annoyed by how he does this...all the rules and all the boundaries...they're good because they protect us...but does our spiritual cotton ball annoy us more than we appreciate him?...hahaha...

i admit...this whole thing is a stretch...i just had to put it though because it reminded me of josh g...the dude can find a spiritual meaning in everything...show him a paper clip and he can lead you to salvation with it...hahaha...till later

the small things...

i had a really interesting conversation with a friend today...it left me with a nagging question...one i've tackled before...i still dont have an answer to the question...not from my previous wrestling...and not from today...so here's the deal...

when we say "god has a plan for my life" what do we really mean?...do we mean that he has a plan of where we are to work, who we are to marry, and what our hobbies are to be?...do we think god literally has a plan for where we are to work?...do we think that god literally has a plan for one specific person for us to marry?...i see two possibilities to these questions...the first is yes...he does...and we need to work diligently to discover what that plan is...this option seems like a lot of pressure to me...mostly because i cant ever remember know 100% for sure that i was making the one decision that god wanted me to make...i think there have been times when i was pretty sure...there have been a lot of times when i didn't care (embarassingly)...and there have been times when i knew i wasn't...but i cant ever remember knowing 100% for sure that i was making the big decision that god wanted me to make...even coming to california...i mean, there were some pretty clear signs that i am walking down a path that god is blessing...but what if i had decided not to come...would i then be on a "less blessed" path?...was god concerned with me coming to california?...

the second option i see is that god doesn't care about some of these details...maybe god doesn't care about where i work...maybe he doesn't care about who i date (obviously there are many thoughts that can contradict that one)...maybe he doesn't care about what i do in my free time...maybe instead he cares about my character while i am doing these things...i mean think about it...nowhere in the bible does it say "you should be an accountant"...instead, it says "you should love others" and "as you go through life tell people about me"...it never says "you must move to california"...instead it does say "if you move to california, serve the people you find there and tell them jesus loves them"...

so here's the whole deal with this thing...i've spent a lot of time seeking god's guidance and lordship on the biggies...like where i am supposed to work, and what i am supposed to be doing with my life...but i am starting to wonder if i should instead just continue to focus on allowing god to shape my character...no matter where i work...no matter who i am dating...and no matter what the circumstances of my life at the particular moment...maybe this is how i allow god to be the lord of my life...in the small things...

till next time...

(ps...i'm not sure i've communicated this well at all...hit me up if this is confusing)

interesting article...true i think...

i was looking at the relevant magazine website this morning and saw this interesting article about happiness...it basically talks about a survey that was done regarding what makes us happy...the survey was done with 13-24 year olds...guess what was #1...time with family...initially when i read this, my reaction was "duh"...but when i stop and think about it more, i am suprised by the results of this study...i mean, remember what it was like to be that age?...time with family was no where on my radar...at all...

it begs a question...if 13-24 year olds really think family time is what brings true happiness...then why dont they seek it out on a regular basis?...why do we, as human beings, so often seek out things that, even we know, aren't the answers to true happiness?...something to think about...

till later...

not much to say...

in an effort to not wait an entire year before i blog again, i've committed to putting something on this thing tonight...hmmmm...i really dont have much to say...i guess i could give a run down of my day...lets see...i sat around this morning watching reruns of the oc...then went to lunch with friends from new hampshire and walked around the shops in laguna...then went grocery shopping...then went to dinner with the roomies...hahahaha...the roomies...hahahaha...i dont know why i find that funny...i just do...anyway, dinner at a japanese restaurant...it was good...then roomie meeting...prayer together and talk about what kind of bible study we want to do together...then we all cleaned up the apartment...it smells good now...thats good...then good phone call with lindsay...now i'm here....i mean, i guess there's more i could write about...but i dont know...just kinda one of those days...at least i wrote...two days in a row...woot...

again...it's been a long time...a lot has changed...

ok, so here's the deal...or i guess i should say a couple of deals...first, i now live in southern california and i work at saddleback church in the high school ministry...second, two of my former students from my ministry in illinois are living with me here in laguna niguel...there is a lot i could say about these two facts...but it would literally take forever...let's just say this...a few months ago i knew god was calling me to saddleback...exciting? yes...naive about what that would look like? yes...awesome? yes...sucky sometimes? yes...gettin the picture?...life has pretty much been a rollercoaster for the past four months...not a bad rollercoaster...just a rollercoaster...the big thing i need to say about this whole thing tonight is this...god is good...sooooooo good...he is healing me...he is providing for me...he is challenging me...he is growing me...he is loving on me...he is changing me...god is good...

the next thing...austin fuller and bryce tucker...two studly fellas living with me now here in laguna...fun...sometimes crazy...fun...scary...fun...stretching...fun...again...gettin the pic?...i love these guys...and again, its another god thing...i have a huge sense of anticipation about what god has planned for this school year when these guys are growing and going and all that...

its a ride right now...

tonight i basically just wanted to put something on here...i've never been in a place where there is so much to blog about before...i've never been in a community about bloggers before...i've never been in a spiritual place where i wanna blog about the god stuff before...

so all that being said...

it's been awhile...but this time its gonna be different...

till later tonight...

(ps...i never made it to thailand...haha...zimbabwe, africa instead...haha...wow...psalm 33- "the lord thwarts the plans of the people"...hahaha...funny funny god)